Cedar Waxwings Drunk on Berries.GilbertMNLorraineHudgins

Cedar waxwings are causing a bit of mayhem in Gilbert, Minnesota lately; they seem to be drunk all the time, flying into people’s houses, crashing into windshields and generally being disorderly. Now waxwing lawyers are claiming it isn’t their clients’ fault; there was an early frost a week ago, which killed the berries they eat, and as the fruit decomposes the juice ferments. Birds are blowing blood alcohol levels 2-3 times the legal limit, walking white lines in field sobriety tests and having to count backwards by 3s, starting at 100. Stay out of the bars in Gilbert for the next few nights unless you want to hear a chorus of waxwings in the corner singing “Danny Bay.” (Lorraine Hudgins)

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